Thoughts

Saw a saying today that kinda fits as my personal motto:

"The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do."

Now, don't get me wrong... 
If you say that I can't cure cancer. I'm probably going to agree with you.
I am not a fan of science (my only C in high school).

If you say that I can't be an independently successful woman...
If you say that I can't do something like data conversion...
If you say that I'll never find my prince charming...
Done, Done and Done.

Yes, all three of those things were said to me at one point in time or another and I buckled down and got it done.  OK, so the prince charming one - I can't really take credit for that one.  But hey, it sounded good as I typed it.  And yes - someone did once tell me that I would never find a man who would want to marry me (was supposedly someone who loved me too - go figure).

If I am in any way on the fence about whether I can do something or not...
All it takes is someone telling me that I can't to get me to set my mind to it.


Another saying that I saw today that struck home:

"H.O.P.E.   Hold On, Pain Ends"

I can only say that I HOPE that the weather in Kentucky clears up VERY SOON.
I have found that:

Stress is Pain

Financial Burden is Pain

Emotional Distress is Pain

Worry is Pain

I am holding onto HOPE as long as I can...
I'm hoping that spirit knows about the critical deadline connected to that HOPE that is out of my control.  I so wish this was something that I could set my mind too!


Namaste.

It is. . .COLD!

Perhaps I realized this because I shoveled the white stuff three times between yesterday evening and this morning (and that doesn't count what the neighbors or the workers did either).

Perhaps I realized this because my furnace has not had a break in quite awhile.

Perhaps I realized this because I am sitting here, near a furnace vent, with goosebumps and teeth chattering.

Or perhaps I realized this because it is 15 degrees (F) without windchill outside my front door.

Have I mentioned lately that it is cold?

Namaste.

"Sunshine is delicious, rain is refreshing, wind braces us, snow is exhilarating; there is no such thing as bad weather, only different kinds of good weather." - John Ruskin

Ever Had One Of Those Days. . .

. . .Where no matter what you do, you can't sit still?

. . .Where nothing keeps your attention?

. . .Where you get way more exercise than planned from running from room to room?


Yep, that's me tonight. I did 1.6 miles on the elliptical and a major back/ab workout and I still have tons of energy to burn. Should be fun trying to get sleep tonight!

Namaste.

"Most people think they live in the world, but I know that the world lives in me." - Depoc Chopra

Still Working On The New Me

I am happy to report that my work-outs are back to full intensity – I even completed a 12-minute mile today on the elliptical (huge for me)!

Have I mentioned that my bottom teeth appear to be straight after about 22 days in the braces? Don’t get too excited. . .The hardware has to stay on for the great orange and black rubber bands that will be a part of my Bengal outfit next season.

I changed my hairstyle last April, but have decided to change it again. Sooooo today, my hair joined the journey to the new me. Keep in mind, this experience was a little nerve-wracking. . .It was the first time that someone other than MommyMarie has cut my hair.

I now have my high-lights (I believe that they are caramel in color) and am sporting a new do! As much as I was a perm-addict growing up, believe-it or not, I now have a style that favors straight hair. Amazingly, I like it! Let’s see if that continues once I have to do it myself. . .

So far, everyone (the four that have seen it) likes it. I’ll let you know the response (or lack of response) that I get tomorrow at work!

Namaste.

“Friendship is the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words.” – George Eliot

Hmmm. . .

WARNING: If you get grossed out easily, you may not want to read this.
I think it's funny, but not everyone shares my sense of humor.


I've had my braces ten days and I've already popped a wire out of a back bracket.

I have approximately 345 days to go before the braces will be removed (I'm not counting or anything). . .
Does that mean I will pop the wire 34 more times?

The one thing I learned about Gall Bladder surgery is: It will stop you up! It was becoming so bad that:
> It became a topic of sisteroo conversation.
> I suspected it was a cause of some weird weight gain.
> I was starting to feel ill (ever see the cartoon about the body parts arguing over who was most important??).

I finally got unstuck after 11.5 days.
> I was relieved.
> I felt better.
> I lost about half of that weird weight gain.

Today, I was searching frantically for the plunger.
You know - the one that has only been used once in ten years. . .
Update: It has now been used twice.

Remember that I mentioned earlier that it hurt my incisions to laugh real hard?
Not anymore! :)

Namaste.

"Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted." - Albert Einstein

Feelings

There is a freedom surrounding feelings:
- They belong to you.
- They are not wrong. . .They just are.
- No one has the right to say that someone else's feelings are incorrect.

I make an effort (I'm may not be 100% successful, but I try) to understand feelings that belong to others. If I did something that was misunderstood (or not) and caused some of those feelings, I want to understand. It is not my place to point fingers or place blame. It is my place to learn, to live and this is part of that experience.

At the same time, I take responsibility for my feelings. They are mine. I try to keep those feelings in "I" statements when discussing them. My opinion is that "you" statements have no place in these types of discussions.

Having said all of that - it still hurts when I share my feelings and then get bombarded with "you" statements that have nothing to do with my feelings or the situations that played a role in creating those feelings. I wish that more people would try to understand rather than jumping to conclusions.

The result? I closed down. I saw no reason to try to explain myself. I let it go. After all - they are my feelings. I understand them. I need to process them. I need to deal with them. It is about me.

Any attachment others may have to them is not about me. . .Those feelings belong to them.

Namaste.

"What you think of yourself is much more important than what others think of you." - Seneca

I'm Back. . .

I took a journey out of town for the holidays. I did try to exercise a bit while I was gone, but I don't know how much scrunches and leg lifts on a motel bed really counts. Unfortunately, I think my muscles are going to go on strike after the work-out I put them through tonight!

I did get quite a bit of shopping done with MommyMarie on Black Friday. I still have a bit more to buy before Christmas, but the pile to wrap has grown pretty high. Yippee!

BabyGirl, Lucy and I headed up to Cleveland to root on our Bengals. We had a great time tailgating - even with the Browns fans next to us (Thanks for sharing the fire pit, glad there was no camera to record the dare). It was so warm that I left my jacket in the van and was fine with a short sleeved t-shirt and my jersey. My hands did get a bit cold on the walk out, but not so bad!

Loved the win, loved the view of the lake, loved the company, loved watching two (maybe three, couldn't tell who the one girl was rooting for) Browns fans get thrown out of their own stadium - OK, saw one Bengal fan get thrown out too.

The only bad part was the drive after the game. It took us roughly 3 hours to get there (2.75 to get to the motel and about another .25 to the stadium) and 6.25 hours to get back. Does anyone else see a problem with this?

Thank God for Lucy's hot tub. Does wonders for those muscles still in the position of clenching the steering wheel and trying hard not to press on the gas pedal. Thankfully, BabyGirl drove the last 1.5 hours or I don't think I would have been able to get out of the van to get into the hot tub.

Namaste.

"Never mistake knowledge for wisdom.
One helps you make a living;
The other helps you make a life." - Sandra Carey

A Different Christmas Poem

The embers glowed softly, and in their dim light,
I gazed round the room and I cherished the sight.
My wife was asleep, her head on my chest,
My daughter beside me, angelic in rest.
Outside the snow fell, a blanket of white,
Transforming the yard to a winter delight.
The sparkling lights in the tree I believe,
Completed the magic that was Christmas Eve.
My eyelids were heavy, my breathing was deep,
Secure and surrounded by love, I would sleep.
In perfect contentment, or so it would seem,
So I slumbered, perhaps I started to dream.

The sound wasn't loud and it wasn't too near,
But I opened my eyes when it tickled my ear.
Perhaps just a cough, I didn't quite know,
Then the sure sound of footsteps outside in the snow.
My soul gave a tremble, I struggled to hear,
And I crept to the door just to see who was near.
Standing out in the cold and the dark of the night,
A lone figure stood, his face weary and tight.

A soldier, I puzzled, some twenty years old,
Perhaps a Marine, huddled here in the cold.
Alone in the dark, he looked up and smiled,
Standing watch over me, my wife and my child.
"What are you doing?" I asked without fear,
"Come in this moment, it's freezing out here!
Put down your pack, brush the snow from your sleeve,
You should be at home on a cold Christmas Eve!"

For barely a moment I saw his eyes shift,
Away from the cold and the snow blown in drifts..
To the window that danced with a warm fire's light
Then he sighed and he said "It's really all right,
I'm out here by choice.
I'm here every night.
It's my duty to stand at the front of the line,
That separates you from the darkest of times.
No one had to ask or beg or implore me,
I'm proud to stand here like my fathers before me.
My Gramps died at 'Pearl on a day in December,"
Then he sighed, "That's a Christmas 'Gram always remembers."
My dad stood his watch in the jungles of 'Nam',
And now it is my turn and so, here I am.
I've not seen my own son in more than a while,
But my wife sends me pictures, he's sure got her smile."

Then he bent and he carefully pulled from his bag,
The red, white, and blue... An American flag.
"I can live through the cold and the being alone,
Away from my family, my house and my home.
I can stand at my post through the rain and the sleet,
I can sleep in a foxhole with little to eat.
I can carry the weight of killing another,
Or lay down my life with my sister and brother. . .
Who stand at the front against any and all,
To ensure for all time that this flag will not fall."

"So go back inside," he said, "Harbor no fright,
Your family is waiting and I'll be all right."
"But isn't there something I can do, at the least,
Give you money," I asked, "Or prepare you a feast?
It seems all too little for all that you've done,
For being away from your wife and your son."
Then his eye welled a tear that held no regret,
"Just tell us you love us, and never forget,
To fight for our rights back at home while we're gone,
To stand your own watch, no matter how long.
For when we come home, either standing or dead,
To know you remember we fought and we bled,
Is payment enough, and with that we will trust,
That we mattered to you as you mattered to us."

I don't know who wrote it, but it appeared in my e-mail in-box and is one of those that I wanted to share.
Even though it is a "Christmas" poem, I thought it was worth reading for Thanksgiving as well.
If anyone is sending packages for the Holidays, please be aware that the mail cut-off date is soon.

Namaste.

"My doctrine is this, that if we see cruelty or wrong that we have the power to stop, and do nothing, we make ourselves sharers in the guilt." - Anna Sewell

Serious WOW!. . .If I Do Say So Myself!

I got weighed and measured tonight at the gym. . .For the first time, we compared the numbers to when I started this transformation almost 11 months ago.

I have eliminated:
* 7 inches from my Shoulders
* 7 inches from my Chest
* 3.5 inches from my Arm
* 7.25 inches from my Waist
* 8.5 inches from my Hips
* 5.75 inches from my Thigh
* 2 inches from my Calf

And drum roll please. . .I have lost 60 pounds!

Wooo Hooo! And I'm not done yet!!!

Namaste.

"You [are] the only person alive who has sole custody of your life. . .Your entire life. . .Not just the life of your mind, but he life of your heart. Not just your bank account, but your soul." - Anna Quindlen

Getting Tired Of. . .

TUNA AND GREEN BEANS!!!

Yes, that has been my dinner every night for the past week. Yes, until I can find some different lean meat (I hear Walmart has good lean beef), it will be my dinner every night for the next week.

I will be so glad when this weight loss competition is OVER!

OK, I admit - I may have to do it again if my weight loss creeps to a stop before I'm ready for it to. . .But for now, I'm going to pretend that won't happen.

Namaste.

"When you rule your mind you rule your world. When you choose your thoughts you choose results." - Imelda Shanklin

Do You Know?

. . .How $*^(*&^ heavy a king-size bed is? REALLY HEAVY!!!

I decided a few weeks ago that I wanted to move my bed to a different wall in my bedroom - the one without any windows (duh - why didn't I think of that 10 years ago?). . .

Today, I got the brilliant idea to do it NOW. Thank God I've lost all the weight that I have and have been working out. It took all of my body strength, a few walls (to push said body strength against) and many hours to get the bed moved.

Don't ask about the rest of the furniture or how I plan to get to my closet tomorrow morning. And I really don't want to discuss the mirror that I hung 10 years ago thinking it was centered on the wall. :(

I feel like I've had two work-outs today and am a little scared of how my muscles will feel over the next two days. Sadillac has already been put on notice - if I decide to move the @%*# thing again, he is getting a phone call!

Namaste.

"Experience is a good teacher, but she sends in terrific bills." Minna Antrim

Want List Great and Small. . .

. . .Yes, I have one! I started it back in late 2000 with the idea that I would cross at least two things off of it each year. This list has many of my dreams - from so grand (Eliminating Violence Against Women) to so small (Walking on a Beach in the Moonlight).

I was off to a great start!

5 in 2001:
Kiss The Blarney Stone; Listen to Irish Music in an Irish Pub Drinking Irish Beer;
Visit Highlands; Visit My Homeland (in Ireland); Watch the Changing of the Guard
4 in 2002:
Find a Spiritual Home; Visit the Golden Temple; Bake Bread from Scratch;
Learn a New Craft (Quilting)
7 in 2003:
Attend Mass at a Cathedral in Europe/UK; Have Fish & Chips in England;
See a "Broadway Show" in London (Chitty Chitty Bang Bang); Have "Tea at the Ritz";
White Water Rafting; Water Ski (even though it only lasted about 3 seconds);
Take a Cruise

Then, nothing! At least on paper. I haven't updated the dern thing since 2003! I have done lots of great things over the last 2.5 years, I just haven't bothered to update the list.

So, I have to go back through the scrapbooks and mark off with the appropriate date, all of the fan-tabulous stuff that I've been doing. I also need to add more things to the list - any suggestions?

Namaste.

"There are shortcuts to happiness, and dancing is one of them." - Vicki Baum

Catching Up. . .

I took the weekend off from the gym - not by choice, but because of "busyness". Well, Sunday was by Bengal choice, but Saturday was just so jammed packed that I couldn't get there before they closed.

The Bengals game was a nerve-racker! I seriously think I saw two different Cincinnati teams play - one the first half (although there may be an argument in there that there were different teams between the 1st quarter and the 2nd quarter even) and a different one the second half. At any rate, Carson's 4-and-1 long pass to Chad Johnson and Kevin Kaesviharn's 4th quarter interception in the end-zone were phenomenal! I even got to cheat on my diet a bit as tomorrow is Sadillac's birthday, so we had a cake (I only had three bites - my trainer was watching!) and two beverages (notice, I didn't have three!).

The full bathroom is about 95% complete. Update: My hot water tank lasts approximately 42 minutes with my new shower jets (is there a new tank in my future???). It should be done tomorrow, but I am under orders to get some pictures up.


You'll see in the shower door reflection that the recessed shelf by the vanity is not done (the thing that looks like a frame is the primer).


There wasn't enough room between the toilet and the vanity for the toilet paper - so we hung the holder side-ways. There's room now!




Found this article on the net via the Monday Morning Quarterback article on SI.com. Makes one think (at least it did me). Don't get me wrong, I will still send the packages - but it is getting harder as more and more of my soldiers are not walking / talking when they come home. http://www.truthdig.com/report/item/200601019_after_pats_birthday/

Tomorrow starts a pretty strict diet from you know where (though I'm pretty happy that it is not carb he!!). I have 2.5 weeks to get some weight off for the competition at work. No more Subway with the sister-roos until final weigh-in. :(

Namaste.

"You will never 'find' time for anything. If you want time you must make it." - Charles Buxton

In Less Than 24 Hours. . .

I will be taking a shower and I will NOT be at Gold's Gym!

I technically could take one in the morning, but then I would be rushed to get to an all day meeting and that would just be horrific, even potentially blasphemes.

I searched and searched and searched for an phenomenal jet shower thing-a-ma-jig.
I practically cried over the multiple tile selections.
I endangered my vision experiencing all of the ugly chalk yellow tiles in order to analyze many display features.
I have been hauling my shower stuff to the gym for 2.5 weeks.

IT IS HEREBY DECREED: The hot water tank, at the condo currently under discussion, will run out of water when this amazing masterpiece is used for the first time.

Says me.

Namaste.

"Home is an invention on which no one has yet improved." - Ann Douglas

Time To Drywall!

As the bathroom is getting into shape, I have to shake my head at the condition of the drywall in my bedroom. It is a mess and either needs to be ripped out and replaced or covered by the thinnest drywall I can find. I'm still debating that one. Whatever I do, I have to do in the closet room as well.





The bathroom is on track to be done this weekend. The sealant is on and tada. . .The shower hardware is installed! I love how the mirror reflects the tile in the back of the shower. The coloring is a bit off as the bathroom only has ~25% of the lighting it normally has. You'll just have to come see the true colors for yourself.

MommyMarie wanted to see the shelves completely tiled - here it is!



Now, I get to pick out the wall color. Decisions, Decisions!



Namaste.

"An idealist believes the short run doesn't count. A cynic believes the long run doesn't matter. A realist believes that what is done or left undone in the short run determines the long run." - Sydney J. Harris

It's Amazing. . .

It's Amazing. . .What 12 hours of sleep does for a body & mind!

It's Amazing. . .How great a wall looks after just a bit of spot painting!

It's Amazing. . .How time is just flying by - ~72 days until Christmas!

It's Amazing. . .How precious babies are!

It's Amazing. . .How much we take the simple pleasures for granted - such as a shower!

Namaste.

"They who see only what they wish to see in those around them are very fortunate." - Marie Bachkirtseff

No Time For A Break

As I start to fight off the sniffles, I realize that I am feeling tired - very, very tired.

Not sure exactly why (though nine straight days at the gym and lugging all of my shower stuff back and forth may play a big part of it). . .Not sure exactly how (ok, maybe getting up at 5am everyday to get my Bengals medallions plays another part). . .But I do know that I have way too much on the verge of being done to stop now.

So, I'm going to rummage through my medicine box (since the medicine cabinet is temporarily unavailable) and get into proactive mode.

Namaste.

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls, and looks like work." - Thomas A. Edison

Crazy Goal

Sadillac, my trainer, and I came up with a new goal tonight: For him to weigh more than me on an ongoing basis.

If we had made this goal three years ago, heck - even one year ago, I would have cried myself to sleep nightly because it was so unattainable. Instead, we were laughing our rears off (yes, in the middle of a workout). . .Not just because it is so crazy, but because it is within sight and damn, that feels good!

His competition is this weekend and then he'll be able to eat again (no way can I get down to what he is right now!). Currently, I am hovering just above the weight that he normally hovers around. With me loosing and him gaining. . .We are going to have to find another goal to laugh hysterically at soon.

Namaste.

"The main thing in one's own private world is to try to laugh as much as you cry." - Maya Angelou

I'm Wondering. . .

. . .How many consecutive days I can make it to the gym.

. . .Why it takes five minutes for the hot water to make an appearance in the showers at Golds.

. . .How many things are extremely valuable, but don't cost a cent to give away.
(love, hugs, kindness, smiles, wisdom)

. . .Why a company would discontinue a Halloween nail color in SEPTEMBER.

. . .How long it will take before I start to go crazy from not being able to shower at home.

. . .Why Mother Nature is such a female dog.

. . .How many things at Michael's can I buy at 40 - 50% off in one week.

. . .Why my tomato plants have so many green tomatoes in the fall, at first frost.

. . .How good are fried green tomatoes.

Namaste.

"A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle." - James Keller

Jello Shots!

On my way to Nickey's to enjoy some Jello Shots!

Yes, I know that they are not on my diet, but my trainer has redesigned my diet and work-out schedule - it starts tomorrow. So, I am determined to enjoy the jello shots tonight as I will be entering weight loss he** tomorrow.

Wish me luck - 25 more to go.

Namaste.

"A true friend laughs at your stories even when they're not so good, and sympathizes with your troubles even when they're not so bad." - Proverb